
happiness in the air. Suddenly shadows
in the form of little creatures appear on
the ground, flat. They emerge from the
ground, and grasp by arms and legs
with their brutal claws, ripping at my
flesh trying to bring me down, but I fight.
A large, flat, black spot reveals itself slowly
under me, the shadows pulling me into the
black hole. My foot falls through the ground
with a jolt, as if there wasn't ground there,
then my other foot. Then my torso with a
third jolt, soon both my arms are submerged
under the black substance with a fourth jolt.
Finally, with a fifth and final jolt, my head is
forced into the dark, black underworld. Death,
is very close now.

17 comments:
THIS ONE ROCKS! just good, love the beginning. ", flat," is kinda unneccesary(no spell check), spots generally are seen in 2D...What would a 3D spot look like? a Sphere?
Te ending was kinda Meh though really good till then. Death is close?? something more like "Death permeates the, air? dark? this void sense of nothingness" anything but death is cloe lol still very cool! like mucho awesomeness points me gusta
um, i think 3D yeah about the 3D spot, and if u thought i meant a 3D spot, i didnt...
yeah, u obviously have a much bigger vocabulary than me. thanks 4the tips, can i put the parts u sed and put them in or were u just suggesting?? if i do, i might change it a bit, so yea... thanks anyway ^-^
*-Accey-*
lol i meant that you didnt need to say flat was all ^^ nvm that lol
you can put in anything you want can't you lol? im not copyrighting anything i say!
(©TheReaper 2008) lol
ok, just wondering cuz sum people get really weird and stupid about that kind of thing. yeah it is stupid but i just wanted to check.
lol nope
k, so. yea this one was kinda weird...
its your best, imo not weird at all....
wats imo??
your kidding right imo-in my opinion
ok, thnx...
welcome, postmore!!!!!!!!!!!!
ok, agen... wat??
your welcome
post more things online
clear enough?
oooooooh, cuz there wasnt a space inbetween. ook. and i have these to new ones, i havent really been working on them but... yea ones bout death... its really emo and im just bored and its stupid. and the others bout hell, its stupid and emo 2.
hey emo is short for emotional no? sadness is an expression too! dont worry about writing morbid or angry things care not what others think of your poetry! poetry is an escape, not a prison! post them please Em
ok, i think I'll do that now, or soon... ok bye, goin to work on it. and the part wen they disappear w/out a trace, i no it dusnt make sense but it fits.
¡¡¡thanks!!! tell me when you post it k? through email.
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